Living life well

Wind in the Trees

/ James Browning

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I find what I go looking for. What I expect seems to manifest itself before me with great frequency. My thoughts shape my life more than any other single factor. Today I feel great and am loving life. With that spirit I choose to begin my day with a thought by Henry Drummond:

…to love abundantly is to live abundantly, and to love forever is to live forever…

With intention I hope to be more aware today than usual and live closely to the ending passage from the book “Contemplate” by Gwen Frostic, punctuated just as she originally wrote and published it:

Savor each moment of beauty –
The majestic – – and the simple . . .

Listen to silence – – –
that in itself
renders all words meaningless . . . . .

Feel the wind in the trees – – –
The ebb and flow of the tides – – –
Wild wings soaring high – – –
– – – the timeless rhythm of life . . . . .

Dream of stars shining over head – – –
– – of the mystic kinship
that underlies all life . . . . .

Keep a sense of wonder –
and of awe – – – –
– – – – forever

Some mornings I am nearly overtaken with gratefulness to be alive. I relish those days when I begin well and know whatever comes, it will be an outstanding day. What  joy to be conscious and able to witness and experience all I will get to smell, feel, hear, taste and see! Come pain or pleasure, trouble or ease, happiness or grief… it will be a good day. I am grateful to be alive!

You will find as you look back upon your life
that the moments when you have truly lived
are the moments when you have done things
in the spirit of love.
Henry Drummond

First posted here on August 28, 2012

13 Things Mentally Strong People Don’t Do

/ James Browning

mountain roadMentally strong people have healthy habits. They manage their emotions, thoughts, and behaviors in ways that set them up for success in life. Check out these things that mentally strong people don’t do so that you too can become more mentally strong.

Text of article removed by request by original author. Go to link below to view.

Taken from an article by Amy Morin http://www.lifehack.org/articles/communication/13-things-mentally-strong-people-dont.html

I am grateful for the reminder to practice what I already know. It is not the knowing that matters. It’s the doing!

I have a simple philosophy:
Fill what’s empty.
Empty what’s full.
Scratch where it itches.
Alice Roosevelt Longworth

The Key To A Happy Life

/ James Browning

Gratitude is the quality of being thankful and showing appreciation. It is a mindful acknowledgment of all that we have been given. When we focus on the abundance in our lives, we discover a greater capacity for generosity, cheerfulness, and contentment.

From “A Poem Of Gratitude” By Chuck Danes

I share my debt of gratitude with all my spiritual friends
Whether Christians, Muslims, Jews, and such or even Buddhist zens
Regardless of the place we live or where your faiths begun
My gratitude begins with this, “I’ve learned that we are One”

I’m grateful for the many days when clarity is strong
As well as those it “seems” that life has somehow led me wrong
For it’s those times that awaken me and nudge me toward the light
Till once again my hopes and dreams are clearly held in sight

I’m grateful for the love within the circles that I dwell
My family, friends and even those who’ve made life seem like hell
For each of those have taught me more regarding how to Love
Provide me feelings to express these things that I write of

I’m grateful too for false beliefs which led me on my quest
For mentors met along the way I truly do feel blessed
Who clearly showed me of the need to understand my worth
And “Higher Truth” which promises a life divine on earth

I’m grateful for the joy I feel, I’m grateful for the fear
Understanding what it is and that it draws me near
To the life I know is waiting on the other side
And when it comes I must hold fast and use it as a guide

I’m grateful for all nature, the birds the grass, the trees
The lakes which hold abundant life, a summer evenings breeze
The clouds above the ground below, the moon, the stars, the sun
The days and nights which represent that another day is done

I’ve learned to stay in gratitude no matter how things seem
That perceptions held as negatives will only slow your dream
So even though my path will lead through troubled spots I know
I must keep on, keep focus fixed, on life’s abundant flow

There’s so much that I’m grateful for, though sometimes I’ll forget
Beliefs rekindled from the past that I perceive as threats
But it’s these times I must remind myself of what I know
That when they show their presence, that they’re here to help me grow

One final thought I’ll share today before I say I’m through
I’m so grateful for these words to give today to all of you
It is my wish that they will help you keep the attitude
Which leads to that which you desire and comes through gratitude
Complete poem: http://www.abundance-and-happiness.com/a-poem-of-gratitude.html

Expressing gratitude is a rewarding habit that affirms the grace of the giver. Gratitude opens our hearts, encourages us to savor each gift that comes our way, and magically frees us from jealously guarding our possessions. It lets us celebrate today rather than waiting for the next level of accomplishment or wealth. It is a reminder that one can always find reason to be glad. open/close from http://www.wisdomcommons.org/virtue/60-gratitude/meditations\

Gratefulness is the key to a happy life that we hold in our hands,
because if we are not grateful,
then no matter how much we have we will not be happy
because we will always want to have something else or something more.
Brother David Steindl-Rast

First posted here on October 18, 2012

A State of Being

/ James Browning

miracle of gratitude

Today I chose just “to be”… and took a day off. Hope your Monday went well, and if it didn’t I hope you found ample strength to cope with what came your way.

We think we have to do something to be grateful
or something has to be done in order for us to be grateful,
when gratitude is a state of being.
Iyanla Vanzant

Live Forever

/ James Browning

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A simple, but profound thought for a Sunday morning….

Sometimes I feel like if you just watch things,

just sit still and let the world exist in front of you,

sometimes I swear that just for a second time freezes

and the world pauses in its tilt. Just for a second.

And if you somehow found a way to live

in that second, then you would live forever.
Lauren Oliver

When such captivating moments grasps me, the wonder of life swirls all around and I am overwhelmed with gratefulness.

The purpose of life is to live it,
to taste experience to the utmost,
to reach out eagerly
and without fear
for newer and richer experience.
Eleanor Roosevelt

Uniquely Original

/ James Browning

what-makes-your-company-uniqueLARGER

There will ever only be one of you — ever. In the history of the universe, you exist only once and you are it. There will never again be another person with your unique intellect, temperament, skills and abilities.

We often get stuck in a rut of who we are and what we can offer without really grasping the greatness that is contained in our uniqueness. We often fail to capitalize on our unique abilities. What limits us is a lack of understanding of our unique gifts, the community we create around us, and knowing the value of our role in life.

You are the only person in the world that will ever see things they way you do. Your personality, experiences, insights, and your emotions all lead you to interact with the world differently from everyone else. You may be only slightly different, but it is different. Only you have seen what you have seen, in the way that you have seen them, and can come to the same conclusions. That voice is essential not only to the world immediately around you but in our every day interactions around the globe.

Our ability to reach beyond our geographies now exceeds our expectations – expectations we set not just a few years ago, but a few months ago. We are continuously amazed at how far and how fast we can reach around the planet. Therefore, your point of view may challenge or support another idea around the globe. You may never know it, or feel it, or see it, but it is, nonetheless, there. Don’t ever underestimate the value that your uniqueness has on the conversation.

One of the universal truths of people is that we seek our own level; we find jobs, communities, partners, friends that align with our personalities and our abilities. Opposites may attract, but our “ecosystem” of personalities tends to mirror ourselves.

The problem with all this likeness around us is that it tends to darken our uniqueness. We see our ideas, beliefs, skills, abilities, etc. similar to others around us and then tend to feel we don’t need to be unique – others either don’t need to see it, or someone else has that covered. The very system we put in place to help support us – to make life easier – is the very system that stifles our own “uniqueocity.”

I am, and forever will be, the only unique me. And right back at you! From an article in “Forbes” magazine by Todd Wilms http://www.forbes.com/sites/sap/2013/10/04/i-unique-you-unique/

Wanting to fit in and be like others is not something I am completely immune to. The worst of it was when I was a teenager, yet even then I did not want to be completely like others. As I have gotten older any wish to be like someone else have become more and more rare.

To a fault as an adult I have frequently rebelled against the ‘norm’ just because it was what was considered ‘normal’. If the majority was going “North”, I’d turn and head “Southeast”. That has certainly NOT been easy, but over time that attitude shaped me, mostly for the best, into a ‘uniquely original’ human being. I am proud of the distinctive person I have become and grateful to be ‘me’.

Never love anyone
who treats you like
you’re ordinary.
Oscar Wilde

Casting Shadows

/ James Browning

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It’s difficult not to be critical when I see someone misbehaving, treating others badly or acting like they are the only one that matters. It has become my practice to try to replace being condemning with a thought like, “you don’t know what this person has gone through to get to here or how hard their life is. Just say a silent quick prayer for them and move on”.

To judge others is to bring judgement to myself. The more I am critical about people the more I train myself to be hard on me! My discovery with intentionally trying not to judge others is I have become less critical of me. It has become apparent that the same disapproving part of me used to condemn others is the same part that can be hyper-critical about myself. That way of seeing was in fact polishing a mirror I used to judge myself.

If we knew the cards and crosses
Crowding ’round our neighbor’s way,
If we knew his little losses,
Sorely grievous day by day,
Would we then so often chide him
For his lack of thrift and gain?
Casting on his life a shadow
Leaves on his heart a stain?

If we knew the silent story
Quivering through some hearts of pain,
Would our human hearts dare doom them
Back to haunts of guilt again?
Life has many a tangled crossing,
Joy has man a change to woe;
And the cheeks tear-washed are whitest,
As the blessed angels know.

Let us reach into our hearts,
For the key to others’ lives,
And with love to erring nature,
Cherish good that still survives;
So that when our disrobed spirits
Soar to realms of light again,
We may say, dear Father, judge us
As we judged our fellow-men.
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I am far from perfect and find myself judging and casting shadows on others more often than I wish. But I am grateful more often than not I catch myself. I redirect my thinking realizing that every time I condemn someone else, I am in fact setting me up judge myself.

Judgement prevent us from seeing
the good that lies beyond appearances.
Wayne Dyer

Intention, Decision and Chance

/ James Browning

windingPath

Does the walker choose the path,
or the path the walker?
Garth Nix

When I was younger destiny seemed out of my control.; a predetermined path to eventual destinations. I grew up, became an adult and stopped thinking much about fate. My mantra was “if it is to be it is up to me”. I was lord and master of my life in those days, or so I thought.

A false sense of clarity is a frequent symptom of youth and my case of the “Mr. Know-It-All” virus was worse than most. Growing up in the chaos of a dysfunctional family caused me to end up with an over developed sense of self-reliance. I learned to survive. My belief was only person I could rely on was me. I entered adulthood believing what Ralph Waldo Emerson wrote, “The only person you are destined to become is the person you decide to be.”

What worked for a while when life was simpler, did not serve me as well when life became complicated with career, marriage and a child. Well into my thirties I began to see that where destiny had placed me had a lot to do with my decisions.

My problem was choices made in my 20s and 30s were too often not the best ones. Good or bad choices, they helped shape my fate just the same. “Destiny is a name often given in retrospect to choices that had dramatic consequences”, wrote J.K. Rowling. Over time I came to make better decisions because I tired of living with and trying to fix choices made recklessly. Better decisions made my destiny better. Seems simple now, but arriving at that realization was anything but simple.

Today I think of destiny as a cosmic soup of intention, decision and chance seasoned with the divine. In the throes of making a big decision it’s never clear exactly what is influencing me. The best I can do is take my time, pay attention to my feelings and ask for outside input from friends and my higher power.

I am grateful for the wisdom life lends a person who is open to learn.

There’s nowhere you can be
that isn’t where you’re meant to be…
John Lennon

My Devil Called “Fear”

/ James Browning

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Unobtrusive music is usually playing when I write and a style of electronic music called ‘chill’ is my favorite to have in the background. Traveling in Europe I developed a taste for this ‘chillout’ music that is characterized by a mellow style and mid to very slow tempo. Today a song called “Hayling” by FC Kahuna (Jon and Dan Kahuna) caught my attention. The song contains only two lines of lyrics that are repeated several times:
Don’t think about all those things you fear
Just be glad to be here.
Those words got me thinking about my “Fear” and the battles I have fought with it (lots of successful ones I might add). Four thoughts that surfaced this morning were:

1) There has been nothing, and I repeat NOTHING, that has had a more negative impact on my life than FEAR. The underpinning of almost every one of my failures, mistakes or fiascos has been one of the family of fearful feelings: dread, worry, anxiety and shame. The realization alone that these are the greatest blocks to joy and happiness diminished their power over me.

Men go to far greater lengths to avoid what they fear than to obtain what they desire. Dan Brown

2) The essence of life boils down into two forces: Love and Fear. Those two emotions are like the ends of a see-saw. The quality of my life is determined by which end is currently tipped. Life is hell when “Fear” is the heaviest. Living is good when I can keep the see-saw balanced. “Joy” fills me when Love has the greater weight.

There are two basic motivating forces: fear and love. When we are afraid, we pull back from life. When we are in love, we open to all that life has to offer with passion, excitement, and acceptance.   John Lennon

3) Far too many of my fears, for FAR too long, were long based on what others thought of me. A “feeling of not being good enough” is fertile ground for fear to grow in and a sense of flaw and defect is water and fertilizer to enhance its growth and power.

The moment we begin to fear the opinions of others and hesitate to tell the truth that is in us… the divine floods of light and life no longer flow into our souls. Elizbeth Cady Stanton

4) My fears thrived in part because I long believed somehow, someway I could figure out ‘why’ things happen or are the way they are. The eventual realization that some things don’t make sense and never will was a giant step. It’s not the answering of ‘why’ that matters most. It’s in the search wisdom is found.

It’s the questions we can’t answer that teach us the most. They teach us how to think. If you give a man an answer, all he gains is a little fact. But give him a question and he’ll look for his own answers. Patrick Rothfuss

Bringing up the subject of “Fear” and writing about it is a bit like dancing with the Devil but hoping to not be burned. The good news for me is seeing/thinking/writing about “Fear” is now figuratively like blowing on coals that usually aren’t hot enough to burst back into flame.  I’m grateful for that. Fear is no longer the silent, hidden and disguised illness within it used to be. Exposure to the light of day makes my Devil called “Fear” smaller and the coals of fearfulness too cold to restart a fire.

I must not fear. Fear is the mind-killer.
Fear is the little-death that brings total obliteration.
I will face my fear.
I will permit it to pass over me and through me.
Frank Herbert

Franklin’s 13 Virtues

/ James Browning

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1726, at the age of 20, Benjamin Franklin created a system to develop his character. In his autobiography, Franklin listed his thirteen virtues as:

1. Temperance. Eat not to dullness; drink not to elevation.
2. Silence. Speak not but what may benefit others or yourself; avoid trifling conversation.
3. Order. Let all your things have their places; let each part of your business have its time.
4. Resolution. Resolve to perform what you ought; perform without fail what you resolve.
5. Frugality. Make no expense but to do good to others or yourself; i.e., waste nothing.
6. Industry. Lose no time; be always employed in something useful; cut off all unnecessary actions.
7. Sincerity. Use no hurtful deceit; think innocently and justly, and, if you speak, speak accordingly.
8. Justice. Wrong none by doing injuries, or omitting the benefits that are your duty.
9. Moderation. Avoid extremes; forbear resenting injuries so much as you think they deserve.
10. Cleanliness. Tolerate no uncleanliness in body, clothes, or habitation.
11. Tranquility. Be not disturbed at trifles, or at accidents common or unavoidable.
12. Chastity. Rarely use venery (sex) but for health or offspring, never to dullness, weakness, or the injury of your own or another’s peace or reputation.
13. Humility. Imitate Jesus and Socrates.

Seems a tall order to live up to this list every day, but then Franklin said he never did. Ben admitted that he was never able to live the virtues perfectly, but felt he had become a better and happier man for having made the attempt. It occurred to me if I pick one each day and focus on bringing more of it in my life I will benefit. I am grateful to you Mr. Franklin for the idea!

It’s about living in the moment
and appreciating the smallest things.
Surrounding yourself with the things that
inspire you and letting go of the obsessions
that want to take over your mind.
It is a daily struggle sometimes and
hard work but happiness begins
with your own attitude
and how you look at the world.
Gretchen Rubin