These days there’s not a lot holding me back from doing most anything I want. I’m single and my son is established and will turn thirty soon. My health is good and my spirits are high for the most part. There is nothing holding me back from having the life I desire. The quandary is what do I want? Or is the life I already have what I need?
There are thoughts about moving out of the country again and enjoying the enrichment that kind of experience brings. I love the experience of a new place and even the discomfort learning a new culture puts me in. It makes the days more memorable and me feel more brightly alive. Costa Rica still attracts me, but there’s a town in Ecuador I’d like to check out that I’ve read has become quite an expatriate destination. Parts of eastern Europe pulls at me as well.
I could retire early and live on a smaller income from investments that would provide for me, but I’d need to live more simply that I do now. Two-years is a retirement goal I set a few months ago, but am uncertain if I will make that far or else just keep on working long past that. Talk about indecision!
I could keep on in my profession for another 10 years but I can’t see myself doing that willingly. The work is hard which I don’t mind, but it is not challenging in a good way anymore. I do enjoy the people I work with and would miss seeing them every day.
Assuming I don’t run way anytime soon, before long I will be able to turn my rec-room into usable space (instead of storage). I am bouncing back and forth between two ideas. One is to set up a game room complete with my pool table, gaming table and all the rest of the trappings I still have from another home. The other idea is to strip the floor to concrete and set up my photography studio gear and make the room work space. I have not had dedicated work space in 15 years for my photography! I like playing pool and a game room is a great place to entertain. However, I don’t entertain often and while I “like” playing pool, I love photography! The photography studio idea is winning as I write and has been mentally on top for a while now.
Looking back over what I have written I can see that one short-term choice has really already been made. I just have to acknowledge that it’s a photograph studio I want most and not a game room. It has been very helpful to read my own words as they caused me to see a little more clearly.
None of what I have written about above previously has been more than casual conversation with a few close to me. Casting thoughts into the world through this blog in a great help. It’s one thing to think thoughts and something quite different cast them into the world for anyone to read.
It has been my discovery that temporary indecision is frequently a good thing. Not being able to decide at any given time just means I am considering my options seriously. I am grateful to have the many options I do!
Remember, there are no mistakes,
trust your choices,
and everything is possible.