All Of You Are Right

SAMSUNG DIGITAL CAMERA“Every man takes the limits of his own field of vision for the limits of the world” wrote German philosopher Arthur Schopenhauer. It’s so easy to think my take on things is the clearest view of reality when everyone has their own perspective that is just as valid for them. I learn nothing by regurgitating what I believe to be true, but can have my perception widened by listening to others with an open mind.

Once upon a time, there lived six blind men in a village. One day the villagers told them, “Hey, there is an elephant in the village today.”

They had no idea what an elephant is. They decided, “Even though we would not be able to see it, let us go and feel it anyway.” All of them went where the elephant was. Everyone of them touched the elephant.

“Hey, the elephant is a pillar,” said the first man who touched his leg.

“Oh, no! it is like a rope,” said the second man who touched the tail.

“Oh, no! it is like a thick branch of a tree,” said the third man who touched the trunk of the elephant.

“It is like a big hand fan” said the fourth man who touched the ear of the elephant.

“It is like a huge wall,” said the fifth man who touched the belly of the elephant.

“It is like a solid pipe,” Said the sixth man who touched the tusk of the elephant.

They began to argue about the elephant and every one of them insisted that he was right. It looked like they were getting agitated. A wise man was passing by and he saw this. He stopped and asked them, “What is the matter?” They said, “We cannot agree to what the elephant is like.” Each one of them told what he thought the elephant was like. The wise man calmly explained to them, “All of you are right. The reason every one of you is telling it differently because each one of you touched a different part of the elephant. So, actually the elephant has all those features that you all said.”

“Oh!” everyone said. There was no more fight. They felt happy that they were all right.

There is much wisdom to gained in allowing room for other viewpoints. Frequently accepting a different point of view does not invalidate mine. It adds to and expands it instead. When I am able to replace my opinion with someone else’s notion of things I mature in knowledge, open-mindedness and my ability for further growth is broadened. I am grateful my beliefs are often shown to me to be true, but just as thankful to find and accept frequently they are not!

Always keep in mind that no single person, place,
or thing can force you to believe or disbelieve anything.
Perhaps this was true when you were a child, but not now.
Now you have the independence to choose what you believe.
Your knowing is yours.
Dr. Wayne W. Dyer

Constant Process Of Discovery

path-of-the-soul1One of my favorite catch phrases is “you find what you go looking for”. When I get a confused or disbelieving look I further explain “expect good and you’ll get it. Expect bad and it will rain crap on you every day of your life.” At that point listeners either continue to look confused, seem to get it or pretend to understand.

“You get what you go looking for” isn’t hippie “speak”, magical lingua franca or New Age vernacular. It’s a proven concept but not particularly about things like wishing for a winning lottery ticket (although it might help!). Rather it concerns the generalized quality of a person’s life.

If feel your life “sucks” it is so because you believe it does! One who clouds his or her head with worries and fear then imagines difficulty headed their way, will surely get it. Someone whose thoughts are frequently about gratefulness, contentment and the expectation of both, will find them in larger quantity.

There is a lie that acts like a virus within the mind of humanity. And that lie is, ‘There’s not enough good to go around. There’s lack and there’s limitation and there’s just not enough.’

The truth is that there’s more than enough good to go around. There is more than enough creative ideas. There is more than enough power. There is more than enough love. There’s more than enough joy. All of this begins to come through a mind that is aware of its own infinite nature.

There is enough for everyone. If you believe it, if you can see it, if you act from it, it will show up for you. That’s the truth.” Michael Beckwith

A heightened awareness of good will bring more good. Having consistent thoughts of gratitude brings more to be thankful for. Being more glad for ‘what is’ than sad about ‘what is not’ allowed my first ever true happiness to find me!

Improving one’s quality of living is simple, yet not easy, but worth every effort. My life (and your life) is a product of thought more than anything else. By growing awareness, my experience of living has markedly changed for the better. I’m not happy and content every moment, but more often than not I am!

At this moment my gratefulness is being expressed through a welling up within of great hope that you find this truth for yourself and practice it.

Drama does not just walk into your life.
You either create it, invite it,
or you associate with people
who love to bring it into your life.
Unknown

Life is a Course in Life

forgivenessForgiveness is a powerful and affirmative part of our humanity. It should be differentiated from its close cousin, acceptance, which while important, is essentially, passive. For many, the healing power of forgiveness allows us to truly move on. A life lived without forgiveness is a life of real pain.

We are all wounded. You will be surprised to hear of all the wounds that normal people carry with them. It may be hard to believe, but many of these wounds can determine how people feel about themselves for an entire lifetime. And everyone’s been hurt in one way or another.

Forgiveness, like grieving, has its stages. It is well known that grieving has its stages. You loved someone, or you lost something dear to you. You go through denial, bargaining, anger, depression and finally you come to acceptance. Forgiveness is a lot like grieving. The important things that we need to forgive don’t come easily.

First, you have to acknowledge that you have to forgive. It is important to your psychological health. Carrying old wounds is simply a burden that steals the pleasure from the life that you have now. We are not on this earth forever, and sitting in victimhood can be such a loss.

Acknowledging a wound that needs healing is only a first step. You also have to deal with real feelings of anger and at times, betrayal. I often think that the word – FAIR – is a four letter word that should sit unhappily with its other, less decent, brothers. Too many people can’t get over just how unfair life is. Such pain, for what? Life is unfair, but it is also filled with potential for beauty, love and grace. The anger over things having been unfair is a product of our immature minds needing to have a balance in nature. Yes, there may be a balance, supervised by God or by nature, but it often has little to do with the narrative that we want to write!

Forgiveness is ultimately a gift you give yourself. It allows the wounds to heal. Asking for forgiveness is a noble act. It is an acknowledgement that you hurt someone and it makes it easier for the forgiver to forgive. It takes a burden away, but this is only the first step. If you really want to be forgiven by the person that you hurt, just apologizing is not enough. You have to try to right the wrong. This is not a perfect science, but a little effort can go a long way. While nothing can undo an unfortunate experience, making amends counts.

Life is a course in life. We are taught by our experiences and no textbook can really do it for us. Learn what each chapter has to teach you. Forgiveness is part and parcel of the emotional work of learning these lessons well. From “The Intelligent Divorce” by Mark Banschick, M.D. http://www.psychologytoday.com/blog/the-intelligent-divorce/201110/can-you-forgive

So grateful am I for the lessons in recent years about forgiveness. Today I am many times more capable of letting go; of forgiving others and myself. It’s amazing how much better life is!

True forgiveness is when you can say,
“Thank you for that experience.”
Oprah Winfrey

Newly Refocused to Clarity

fa892c9ecFailing to meet your true destiny is a tragic act of free will.

Those dozen words from Anthon St. Maarten have been swimming around in my head since encountering them for the first time yesterday. I have since expanded the short statement into a generalized meaning that helps me to hang on to my interpretation of Maarten’s words:  when my life situation is no longer blamed on other people, circumstances and fate, my perception is peeled back to show it is my choices and actions that most shape my life. Intellectuality I already knew that. But having that wisdom newly refocused to clarity is a sure path to an improved use of my free will and in turn a conduit to a continually improving life experience.

I made sure to pay attention to everything I was doing. To be fully in the moment. Because that’s all life is, really, a string of moments that you knot together and carry with you. Hopefully most of those moments are wonderful, but of course they won’t all be. The trick is to recognize an important one when it happens. Even if you share the moment with someone else, it is still yours. Your string is different from anyone else’s. It is something no one can ever take away from you. It will protect you and guide you, because it IS you.

Until recently, I thought it was death that gave meaning to life–that having an endpoint is what spurred us on to embrace life while we had it. But I was wrong. It isn’t death that gives meaning to life. Life gives meaning to life. The answer to the meaning of life is hidden right there inside the question.

What matters is holding tight to that string, and not letting anyone tell us our goals aren’t big enough or our interests are silly. But the voices of others aren’t the only ones we need to worry about. We tend to be our own worst critics. Ralph Waldo Emerson wrote: ‘Most of the shadows in this life are caused by our standing in our own sunshine.’ … Wisdom is found in the least expected places. Always keep your eyes open. Don’t block your own sunshine. Be filled with wonder. From “Jeremy Fink and the Meaning of Life” by Wendy Mass

The meaning of life is not some cosmic, out-of-reach and mysterious explanation. That’s difficult to see most of the time because us humans have the innate ability to over complicate things and obscure our ability to accurately see, know and perceive. Only by living rooted in the present as much as possible is “the meaning of it all” to be found. It is not “outside of me”. I was born with it, but have been conditioned to believe I was incomplete and the meaning of my life was outside of me. IT ISN’T!

Even without being exposed to the clarity of St. Maarten’s statement before, I’ve been living with that sort of self-direction now for several years. Gratefully, with those dozen words as a newly focused reminder I can do it even more.

There are essentially two questions in life –
a spiritual question and a material question.
The spiritual question is ‘Who am I?’
The material question is
‘What am I to do with my life?’
One leads to the other.
Rasheed Ogunlaru

Gratitude+Life=A Better Life

gratitude montage

I would be grateful if you’d forward to a few friends
an installment of G.M.G. you find meaningful and help set a record
for readership for GoodMorningGratitude.com’s second birthday on April 25, 2013.
Thank you.

Window With A Different View

6312097041_b093d9c916_bI would be grateful if you’d forward to a few friends
an installment of G.M.G. you found meaningful and help set a record
for readership for GoodMorningGratitude.com’s second birthday on April 25, 2013.
Thank you.

Life without thankfulness is devoid of love and passion. Hope without thankfulness is lacking in fine perception. Faith without thankfulness lacks strength and fortitude. Every virtue divorced from thankfulness is maimed and limps along the spiritual road. John Henry Jovett

What a fast two years it has been. The benefits of sharing a little of myself with the world each day yields multiplied blessings the longer I do it. My view of the world is through a window with a different view from any I have known before. From where ever and what ever the inspiration came, I am humbly and deeply grateful.

The value we place
on what we’ve been given
correlates to our depth
of gratitude for it.
Todd Stocker

Sweetner for Living

aweIn six days GoodMorningGratitude.com will be two years old. Every day I have left something here with the exception of one. When inspiration arrived from a source outside of me twenty-four months ago to do this, it was not in my wildest imagination to believe I could be this committed.

Researching and writing has been a profound teacher. Lessons about commitment and belief are near the top of the list. However, it’s gratitude itself that my education has been most about. Without a shred of a doubt it’s my certain knowing that what I pay attention to and think about is what I get more of. By expanding my level of thankfulness, I have become far more grateful and with more gratefulness every smidgen of my existence has been made better.

Be thankful that you don’t already have everything you desire,
If you did, what would there be to look forward to?

Be thankful when you don’t know something
For it gives you the opportunity to learn.

Be thankful for the difficult times.
During those times you grow.

Be thankful for your limitations
Because they give you opportunities for improvement.

Be thankful for each new challenge
Because it will build your strength and character.

Be thankful for your mistakes
They will teach you valuable lessons.

Be thankful when you’re tired and weary
Because it means you’ve made a difference.
Author Unknown

Earlier than two years ago I was grateful person, but focused my thanks on the “good stuff”. Today even more so I am grateful for the pain, difficulty and heartache that has tutored me in the art of living well. For this morning and the following five days until the third year of GoodMorningGratitude.com begins, expressed here will be my gratefulness for learning how to practice the sweeter for living: G R A T I T U D E.

One of the main reasons that we lose
our enthusiasm in life is because
we become ungrateful…
we let what was once a miracle
become common to us.
Joel Osteen

I would be grateful if you’d forward to a few friends
an installment of G.M.G. you found meaningful and help set a record
for readership for GoodMorningGratitude.com’s birthday.Thank you. James

Understanding, Knowledge, and Insight

234849801_6cebb4feabDo not believe in…
anything simply because you have heard it.

Do not believe in…
anything simply because it is spoken and rumored by many.

Do not believe in…
anything simply because it is found written in your religious books.

Do not believe in…
anything merely on the authority of your teachers and elders.

Do not believe in…
traditions because they have been handed down for many generations.

But after observation and analysis, when you find that anything agrees with reason and is conducive to the good and benefit of one and all, then accept it and live up to it. Buddha

Less than a hundred words makes a positive starting point for my day, far more than a thousand words could have.  Truth is usually not complicated. Authentic wisdom is typically easy to comprehend. Certainty presents itself readily to one interested in what really is.  Understanding, knowledge, and insight are never more than a thought away if I am open to it. Gratitude brings a lightness to me as the sun comes up. It will be another good day.

There is no knowledge
so hard to acquire
as the knowledge
of how to live this life
well and naturally.
Michel de Montaigne

Why the Sadness Passes

the_stillness_of_march_by_nelleke-d5h14q9It seems to me that almost all our sadnesses are moments of tension, which we feel as paralysis because we no longer hear our astonished emotions living.

Because we are alone with the unfamiliar presence that has entered us;
because everything we trust and are used to is for a moment taken away from us;
because we stand in the midst of a transition where we cannot remain standing.

That is why the sadness passes:
the new presence inside us,
the presence that has been added,
has entered our heart,
has gone into its innermost chamber
and is no longer even there;
is already in our bloodstream.
And we don’t know what it was.

We could easily be made to believe that nothing happened,
yet we have changed, as a house that a guest has entered changes.

We can’t say who has come, perhaps we will never know, but many signs indicate that the future enters us in this way in order to be transformed in us, long before it happens.

And that is why it is so important to be solitary and attentive when one is sad:
because the seemingly uneventful and motionless moment when our future steps into us is so much closer to life than that other loud and accidental point of time when it happens to us as if from outside.

The quieter we are, the more patient and open we are in our sadnesses, the more deeply and serenely the new presence can enter us, and the more we can make it our own, the more it becomes our fate. Rainer Maria Rilke

Rising whole and feeling well after a few days of moderate depression, I can find gratitude for those few days of monochrome life. Learning to use such times as a way of contrast to better days has greatly enhanced the good. And so today with much gratefulness I go into my day feeling contented, happy and a little stronger from enduring another little storm.

If you do not believe that hearts can bloom suddenly bigger,
and that love can open like a flower out of even the hardest places,
then I am afraid that for you the road will be long and brown and barren,
and you will have trouble finding the light.
But if you DO believe, then you already know all about magic.
From “Liesl & Po” by Lauren Oliver

Like Quicksand

5633485384_289d9cd89e_zDepression…

removes the color from the colorful…

reduces the difference between day and night…

crowds out self-esteem with self-loathing…

takes away the pleasing taste from everything…

creates a sense of being UN-loveable…

brings all past mistakes to present-moment…

shades life with a shadow without a sun…

invents pain and hides joy…

makes effort seem meaningless…

concocts a need to sleep that never results in rest…

takes away desire to work, create or achieve…

cuts one off from other people…

detaches love and happiness…

amplifies grief and sadness far beyond reality…

scorches the ability to love and feel love…

produces a state of caring about little to nothing…

generates self-told lies that are believed…

shapes a good person into believing they are bad…

and on and on and on and on…

Depression is a liar, a thief, a distorter, a con man, a fake, a fraud, a pretender, a robber, an imposter, a hypocrite, a crook, a phony, a sham, a cheat, a bandit, a charlatan, a deceiver, a trickster, a swindler, a rogue, a double-dealer, a villain and false in every sense, thought and feeling.

These are the sort of truths I remind myself when cycling depression comes to call on me for a few days every month or two (as it has this weekend). With such thoughts at the forefront, I am able to see the big shadow of feeling depressed is being caused by something small; like a mouse casts a giant shadow when light is cast at a particular angle. No longer do I resist depression for it is like quicksand; the more resistance given, the deeper I will sink.

So I will let my depression pass like a strong wind through a tree, knowing it will die out in a few days. Each episode makes me stronger now like a tree’s roots are made stronger by its standing up to storm after storm. I am grateful beyond words for my understanding today of depression that usually makes it little more than emotional indigestion; ’twas not that way for so very long.

One in six people suffer depression
or a chronic anxiety disorder.
These are not the worried well
but those in severe mental pain
with conditions crippling enough
prevent them living normal lives.
Polly Toynbee